A Narrative Around an Object
It is circular in shape, symbolizing infinity. It is made of the most precious metal, and every time I touch its smooth texture and see the reflection of light in its bright yellow color, my memories spin across this ¾” circle. Its value exceeds monetary representation, but the meaning and the story behind the engraved letters represents almost 25 years of my life.
I can remember clearly the day I received it. Love was the force that drove this object to my possession, and today it’s the same love that connects my past, my present, and my future. A name and a date has been encrypted in its inner face. It signifies an agreement that was supposed to be eternal, but what it is eternal? Is love eternal? I might not have the right answer to this, but when I place my hands around my possession, I can feel its power, and assure you that my love is, in fact, eternal.
Five years ago, the meaning of this piece of metal was disrupted abruptly. The circle was no longer a circle. The continuity, the covenant, and the promises were lying lifeless. I didn’t even want to wear it anymore. I thought about destroying it or throwing it or giving it away. I was emotionless, and I couldn’t look into its reflections of light. Silently, I buried it in a box.
It took time and more than zillion tears to bond my heart-feelings to its endless shape. There is no longer a beginning or an end to my devotion. It is just a piece of gold that entitles a new commencement, and I wear it every day. I no longer place it on the fourth finger of my left hand, but instead it hangs on a gold necklace. Each time I squeeze it between my fingers I can remember his name and our story. I can scream this name at the top of my lungs and he won’t answer because his existence wasn’t eternal, but the life-memories that are link to this circle are.
I made a vow once, a ritual that was sealed in the instant I wear this object for the first time. A measurable number of days have passed, emotions have been recollected, more names have been added, new titles have been gained, and this object will exist in my custody forever.
I have promised to myself to continue wearing it, knowing that the agreement is no longer an agreement in this physical world, but the force of love that one day drive us together into this circle is eternal. The memory of my beloved husband German, the life we created together, our daughters Mariana and Juliana, the love and even widowhood as my new title will be eternally represented in my wedding ring ...